At Ease with Myself...

It's taken a while, but I'm finally at peace with being myself.

Loosely translated, I am no longer obsessed with my weight, or how my arms jiggle when I wave goodbye, or that my thighs "kiss" when I sit down. :P

I've realized that should I continue to be unhappy, I will never be able to live my life, if I'm always worried about how I look or how people see me. I would guess that age plays an important factor where being at peace with one's self is concerned. It would be immature to still worry about the little things even as you sit and contemplate turning a ripe age of 35, for instance.

It takes a lot before you reach that stage of loving yourself as is, and the after-effects can be quite pleasantly surprising.

For one, I seem to be attracting younger men... which is funny, since I had no luck with men when I was in my 20s, only much older men. And now that I'm in my thirties, I've got guys looking like they've just graduated college, check me out or even flirt outwardly. I've got to be doing SOMETHING right if that's happening! LOL!

At the moment, the one right thing I am doing is taking care of myself. Yes, I got a personal trainer at the gym, and I've been spending more time at the gym lately than I have at home, in bed. The goal is to have buckets more energy so that I can better enjoy my holidays, especially where lots of walking and exploring are to be had. I also need to make sure that the ticker keeps on ticking and that I don't become a walking time bomb ever since my dad's heart attack. They say your risk is higher once you have one parent with the disease.

My singular goal is to be strong and healthy enough that I can last the distance on a daylong hike, or very close to it. If I end up looking like Jennifer Hudson after she went on Weight Watchers, well that's just a big fat plus. ;) But I'd be lying if I said it wouldn't matter if I lost two dress sizes, because it would be the icing on my oh-so-much-healthier cake. :)

But I'd be damned if I have to follow a strict diet to whittle down, because I still eat what I want, only a little less than even my previous usual helpings. And whatdyaknow... I'm still dropping kilos! :D

It's amazing what happens when you start loving and accepting yourself more... just the way you are.