That weight on my shoulders is 6lbs

I knew this would happen. A few months ago, I started sliding a little bit with my workouts and not controlling what I ate. Before you decide that I'm one of those crazy health freaks who diets, let me assure you that I am so not! I lost a total of 28lbs since I got myself a personal trainer over a year ago, who has helped me a lot by putting me on the right exercise plan. This was important because I'm bow legged and with my knee injuries I can't certain types of exercise. The food part, I had to work that out on my own, and I succeeded at it thanks for the most part, to this book called Women, Food and God by Geneen Roth. Anyway, I started sliding with my workouts and what I ate a few months ago, and needless to say I've regained 6 lbs!!! It's the worse feeling in the world to be back in that weight category that I tried so hard to get away from. Well, I knew it'll only get worse because I hadn't the time to hit the gym the few weeks prior to Christmas and when I finally weighed myself this week, I gained another 2lbs. What I'm upset about is not only because I fell off the bandwagon but also because I allowed myself to get off track and forget the discipline it took to get to where I had been until a few months ago. The last thing I need is to forget why I'm doing this, which is to be stronger and have more stamina so I can do the things I used to love doing without having to catch my breath. The weight loss and looking better are just a bonus. It's Jan 5, and my goal is to lose another 34lbs, although I'll be 20lbs away from my ideal weight. But I'm not going for ideal! I'm going for healthy. And I'll be damn if I let a few hiccups come between me and my goal!! Now if you'll excuse me, I've got some bicep and tricep curls to complete. :)

Going meatless post-Christmas and NY holidays

The Christmas holidays is everyone's excuse to gorge on too much food and drink, especially meat! Turkey, lamb, pork, chicken and beef (usually in that order) are consumed on an almost daily basis until New Year's day, when brand new resolutions kick in, the most famous being taking better care of one's health, and I'm being kind here. That's what I planned to do when I returned to work. It's been two days, and I've upped my fish, vege and fruit intake, without touching chicken at all. But then the leftovers of mum's Pork Vindaloo which we ate on New Year's day was too tempting to resist! So now I feel a little ill. Urrgghhh... This is also the time when we tend to appreciate simpler meals after eating too much of meat the week prior. Spinach soup with chicken feet, prawn sambal and fried chinese sausages are all one needs to be blissfully happy. :) It's also day two of my 2013 workout. Walking at a slower pace than usual on the treadmill has never been as challenging as it was today, simply because I was walking through the pain in my left knee. It took all of my willpower not to push the big fat STOP button when all I needed to do was complete 15 minutes with an incline of 6%. And not workin out for 3 weeks then going back and starting over is like joining a boot camp! Every muscle hurts like the first time I had my butt kicked by my personal trainer on my first session with him. Speaking of working out, I'm always amazed by some of the members at the gym who can't help but cast what I think are envious stares at my sheer ability to sweat buckets within five minutes of starting my workout. What they don't realise is that I wished I didn't sweat so much, except of course at the gym. But it happens at will, especially when I stand near a heat source. Beads of sweat start to appear on my forehead and neck within 10 seconds!! I feel so cursed!! But being a fool for pain, I'm going back for more tomorrow. Adrenaline pumping through your veins sure feels better than a few shots of tequila during happy hour on a Friday night! :)

Resolution One Underway plus other sad mishaps

It was the first day of work for many today, the second day of 2013. Like me I'm sure many of you returned to the realities of daily life dragging your feet into work. I had loads to do on my return: reports of the previous month's performance; a job appraisal yet to be completed as well as preparing myself wholly gorge a new role. A daunting thought but I'm determined to be positive and motivate myself to do even better! Today I also found myself pouting a little less, as I promised to smile more at strangers and make better eye contact, as opposed to looking like the Grinch! As I headed for the gym today after work, I encountered a random act of kindness. While waiting to cross the road to enter the building where my gym was located, a young man decides to stop his car and motioned for me cross over before going on his way. I was grateful, not because I was relieved to have crossed the street as although traffic was heavy, it was also slow moving, so I would have eventually made a less than quick dash across. But it was the fact that someone decided to be nice and willingly wasted a few seconds to give me way that's put a warm fuzzy feeling in my heart. But that didn't last long. As I got in the elevator to head up to the gym, I waited for this couple to enter so I held the door for them as they took a while before deciding to ride the lift with me. But was there any show of gratitude?? Certainly not. Then when we got to our floor and I motioned for them to get off first, they obviously did but again... no thank you. While I don't expect anything in return for being kind to people I sure as hell am not expecting them to not show any sign of acknowledgement either. Ah well, the year is still young and I will continue to report on the kindness of strangers as well as the indifference of some. Time for bed!

A New Year, a new day... and the beginning of my 2013 literary adventure

Happy New Year everyone! Somewhere last year, I made a promise to myself that I would start fresh in putting my thoughts, beliefs, anger, expressions of love/lust/happiness and whatever I may be feeling into my blog. And no better time to start than today. 2012 had been a great year, for me anyway. I plucked the courage to leave my old job, which was wearing me down physically as well as mentally and emotionally, and join a new one. I'm glad I did, because everything is different, most importantly the people that I work with! A new supervisor who is wonderfully understanding and compromising (AND young) as opposed to the old ways and almost draconian one I worked for 4 years prior. Among other factors, I left to "get well." There were other notable events but my job was the biggest change. It's funny, but I never truly enjoyed Christmas that just passed. I didn't feel the spirit of the holidays like I do every year. And just last night, on New Year's eve, I was sad for some reason. I wasn't sure if it was because I was feeling sorry for myself for believing in people and having them let me down again and again, or that I liked these people enough to want to give them another chance but know that I may only be fooling myself in the process. In my pain, I swore I would be cynical this year but I am not sure that even I would believe in that promise! Then, there's the other reason: that I may be losing a loved one, usually to death. So, being a God-fearing human, I prayed and PRAYED that I lose no one to illness this year. It's a brand new year and I think there should be resolutions this year. I had none the last two years! I still plan to travel and hope to see the Taj Mahal in India, go to Kathmandu and perhaps see a bit of Laos. The resolution bit? Going solo! :) Next, I've been told I rarely smile and as a result, makes me more unapproachable to people! Oh God, I'm turning into Dad!! This year, I pledge to smile at more strangers, and hopefully, make new and interesting friends along the way. But I am a nice girl, really I am!! Although I have no resolutions that involve weight loss (the D word is a SIN in my book) it would be great if I could take more walks, apart from the ones on the treadmill, pending great weather. Dammit, wished I didn't melt like a damn snow cone everytime I stand near the mearest heat source! I wanna rock climb!! Yes, under the circumstances, I may not be able to, even after I've reached the optimum level of fitness to do this, but I want to be able to try. Being bow legged only allows me to walk, but not necessarily to rock-climb or bungee jump (DON'T. EVER. TRY. - says my personal trainer). I'd like to think of these as goals for the year. When you turn your resolutions into Goals, they somehow seem less threatening and you are more determined to reach them. So maybe I did have resolutions which I've met the last two years; I just dressed them up as goals, hehe... Time for breakfast and then help Dad prepare for NY lunch!! :) Welcome 2013!!!